Reviews of The Runway | New York Social Diary

2.14.11: Ellin Reviews The Runway | New York Social Diary

This is a great summary of this weeks top pick for New York Fashion week (Fall / Winter 2011). My personal Favorite is PRABAL GURUNG. The man can do no wrong in my eyes....

Gent's Monday Jack and Coke - Sag and Testies

As stated in my last post, this week I am going to alternate my target every day from women to men when about the do's and don'ts of reflecting a classy image without sacrificing sex appeal or comfort when on the dating/socializing scene. When men hear the word "classy", they tend to assume it applies to women, but it doesn't. I've seen too many obvious penis adjustments, yellow spots on shirts, sucking on chop sticks, doors slamming back in a woman's face, and Christian Audigier from head to toe to let men slide on this subject.

It's Valentine's Day and where I am, my internet keeps coming on and off so I'm going to have to make this post as short as possible in order to actually have a post at all. Promises are promises, so I've got to give you something...

How the blog is broken up: an individual's appeal starts with first impression then moves to personality/body language.

DISCLAIMER (reminder): Because there were SO many different things to write about on this subject, I decided to stick to 1 main issue each night of the Valentine's Day week 2011, one for the ladies and 1 for the gents, alternating. Ladies First....

Monday, Valentine's Day

GENTS

First Impression

• Loose Fit. In choosing this subject, I had to put myself in the position of sitting at a table alone and a man walks in. What would be on the top of the turn-off list? Baggy clothes. I know some of you are thinking..."that's hip hop", "only ghetto people dress like that".....WRONG! I call this disease Confused Comfort to Fit disorder CCFD (I love making up my own disorders, LOL). Men suffering from this, tend to purchase clothing that are at least 2 sizes bigger because they feel : a) More comfortable . b) They think they look bigger/more toned. c) They THINK they are hiding a belly, love handles, or their butt. d) They look are hip, cool, and urban e) They are just clueless as too how things are supposed to fit. From boys in the hood to office executives in suits, I've seen this sad situation so I'm going to attempt to briefly address how you can start recovering from this problem with some cues for recognizing the issue and some tips.
  

1. If you look down at your jeans or pants, and have more than 1 "bunch" at the bottom, then your pants are hanging to low or you need to have them shortened
2. If your pants from behind resembles what a baby's does with a "loaded" diaper, then your pants are too large.
3. If when you put your wallet in your pocket, it hits the lower half of your thigh, your pants are too low.
4. If when you put (if you put) a belt on, the waist bunches in the back or the front, your pants are too damn big.
5. If you have skinny legs and a little butt, baggy pants make you look even thinner. Besides, dropping those pants in front of a women and revealing twigs would definitely hurt your sexy points.
6. If without a belt, half your butt cheeks (if any) show, they are too big!
7. If the seam of your shirt's sleeve is hanging past your shoulder, your shirt is huge. It doesn't make you look like you have bigger shoulders. It makes you look like you borrowed your larger friend's shirt. This same rule applies to jackets!
8. If when you are wearing a dress shirt, you can still slip your little sister's backpack under it..You guessed it...huge! Side note - if wearing a white shirt, keep it ALL white not creamy in color. PA LEZZZ. Can't tell? hold it next to a white paper napkin from a fast food joint. You'll be clear on what white is supposed to be then. Eww.
   
9. Reality check: Trying to cover a belly by leaving the dress shirt out? Do this...lean back slightly while having your profile face the mirror, if there is no gap between the bottom of your shirt and pants, your belly isn't as big as you thought. TUCK IT IN. A man with a slightly tapered shirt tucked in IS HOT. Women want to see your booty and manly V shaped body even if its not in perfect shape. We think it looks confident, sleek, classy and, not to mention, expensive! A man that exudes success, take pride in how he looks without complicating it. His main objective is fit. THIS IS WHY TAILORS EXIST AND ARE EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!! If you are not sure if things fit right, take them to a tailor so he hooks you up with hot fit. Don't think you are successful enough for all of this? Then this is a great way to fake it until you make it.
   

Personality and Body Language

• Grab Life by the Testies. Nothing worst then a man that can't make decisions or needs to be babysat. There is no amount of money, no high position in a large corporation, no Ivy league advanced degree that can make a man seem manly when they can't make decisions or take initiative. THIS IS TOP ON MY TURN OFF LIST. You know those guys: " what do you want to do tonight" every night guys. The "Whatever you are having or want" all of the time guys. The "Its better if we go buy your birthday gift together because I don't want to make a mistake" guy. The "do you have any special dishes not mentioned nor on the menu you can prepare for me (while I starve)" indecisive guy. The "can you help me pick my shirt (6th one)" when we are only going to a basketball game, metro-sexual guy. Most women hate this. With all of the bra, panties, makeup, perfume, hairdo, shoes, dress, ice cream flavors...not to mention combined with hormones..woman have EARNED their right to indecisiveness. Men are supposed to be our rock and lead us when we are just confused. When we can't pick the right jeans, YOU are supposed to say, "you look great in everything. Let's go or we are going to be late". When we can't figure what we want, you are supposed to take the lead and offer suggestions. Remember this guys, IF we ASK YOU a question, we are looking for YOUR answer. Saying what pleases us most of the time, has a very short life span in keeping a woman's respect. We want Superman, Spider-Man, Prince Charming, AND MacGyvor (and my personal old school favorite - Crocodile Dungee). Yes, its almost impossible these days to find all of these in a man..but damn it, give us 1. Sitting on your tail end, waiting for us to guide your plans, what you eat, where you travel to, what you are to wear, among other things, makes you become our son. We can't enjoy making love to a child. Think about it.
  

:-)

Follow me on Twitter www.twitter.com/pauldine

Ladie's Sunday Mimosa - Boobs and things

Ok..This is may be a touchy subject but I'm going to write about it anyway. I received several recommendations to write about the do's and don'ts of reflecting a classy image without sacrificing sex appeal or comfort when on the dating/socializing scene. Considering what I see on a day to day basis, I get the NEED of exploring this issue. Living in Miami, you see it all. This city, as vibrant and liberating as it is to live here, is also one of the most class, fashion-deprived cities in the world. The fashion, personal sense of style, . Its polyester, spandex, shorts and flip flop city and those are the people NOT at the beach.

Many people beleive that sophistication and sex appeal are polar opposites. I don't believe this is true. I think there can be something very sexy about a sophisticated person, that knows how to put themselves together, and "walk the walk".

I started this post by focusing on women but then remembered the several faux pas I've seen men commit so decided to toss them into the mix. Since an individual's appeal starts with first impression then moves to personality/body language, I've sub-divided the gender groups accordingly.

DISCLAIMER: Because there were SO many different things to write about on this subject, I decided to stick to 1 main issue each night of the Valentine's Day week 2011, one for the ladies and 1 for the gents, alternating. Ladies First....

SUNDAY, Valentine's Day eve

LADIES

First Impression

• Underwear and Body parts. I don't see how some women don't suffocate themselves with their own push up bras. They can be so padded and lifted that the collar bone is barely visible! I understand that a woman's bosom can be the highlight of her look and the jewel of her confidence. Nothing wrong with that! But if this is the direction you are going to go, just remember that before a man (or anyone for that matter) can actually get to the point of listening to what you have to say, its going to be an uphill battle. My suggestion is if you are going to proudly display boobage, go more subtle and covered on the rest. An outfit should not have more then 1 major focal point in order to keep it clean and classy. Make sure the bra is not visible, try to stick to solid colored tops, and go light on the "look! tits here" jewelry..trust me, we see 'em...they walked in 2 minutes before did.
  

The tips above also apply to leg and rear-end exposure. If one of these are your
pride and joy, go ahead an expose. Just remember that once your in winter
weather, you look like an idiot walking around in a tight mini with no tights and
open-toed shoes. That, my friends, is a disease I call contra-weather irrational
dressing CWID (I just made it up). If weather permits and legs are the key
ingredient for your outing, put bronzer or non-greasy lotion for a nice , glossy even
look. Bruising, lumps, uneven skin tone, and pale gams are not cute so spend
sometime prepping these bad gals. Remember, even though legs, thighs, and crotch
are all connected, doesn't mean you have to expose all three. Test for potential
crotch shots by touching your knees or walking around the sofa a 3 times. If you
have to any panty flash or had to tug on the skirt more than once, then you are
going to look like "one of those". You know which ones...Put some personality in
your style! Wear the mini with a simple tank and a blazer, fitted dress shirt open up
2-3 buttons down (sexy but not too much), or silky tank. Take some cues from
Gossip Girl, Sex in the City, The City, The Hills and some other shows where the
leading ladies are setting fashionable trends. Most of the characters exude sex
appeal without looking trashy. Now if you watch Girls Next Door, Holly's World or
Jersey Shore and like their outfits, then this blog can't help you...there's just a taste
level issue that is way to corrupted. Sorry.

Personality and Body Language

• "What do you do?", "where do you live?", "Nice car", or glancing at the check while he reaches in his wallet to pay. Any of these seem familiar? I've observed these occurrences a thousand times. You THINK he doesn't notice but he does. It's very obvious most of the time. You are sizing him (or her - equal opportunity here) up. What's worst is when this question is within the first few when getting to know someone. These questions and behavior makes it seem like the answers to these questions are the initial most important ones for you. Unless the person refers to their job often (a turn off of mine) or hints of how far they live, why ask? If its conversation topics you don't have, then here are a few suggestions: What you do for fun? jokes. Movies. Great places to eat. The city and how long you guys have been living there. Are you born and raised there? Sports. FIND COMMON GROUND! Try non offensive jokes or not too humiliating stories to establish a connection. Also be careful not to ask anything too personal or forward such as "do you like kids?" Remember this.. when socializing or dating, your biggest asset once conversation starts is HOW YOU MAKE PEOPLE FEEL ABOUT THEMSELVES AND IN YOUR COMPANY. Hanging out with you should be like a mini vacation so keep it light, comfortable just smart and witty. Be patient. You'll get to know everything that you want to know eventually if you want to hang out again. If you don't care to hang out again?...then the answers don't matter anyway

:-)

Follow me on Twitter www.twitter.com/pauldine

Haiti gets support from Celebrities at 1OAK

Please go out and show your support. Haiti needs your help and everyone can contribute their time while dancing. Nice to know that Haitian's will be "served" with respect this evening....

HAVE FUN EVERYONE!!!

Counting Petals - Is the feeling real?

Do they love me or love me not? Pluck, pull and watch a false sense of fortune-telling slowly fall to the ground.

SNAP OUT OF IT...

Forget psychics, your horoscope, and what the "others" say. They don't know much more than you do. Hell, you can even forget what I say (written)......but answering the first question should come from your gut. What's the gut? It's your instinct. That's little voice inside of you that says "this is good" and "watch out!" that we sometimes ignore to give into other "talking" parts. How do I know if its telling me the truth? You don't. That's the gamble in life, love, and human interactions in general. We have to take the leap, but a calculated one. Below, I've complied a general list based on several conversations I've had with both male and female friends (varying ages, sexual orientation, social status, race, religion) on how to tell if someone really likes you sincerely, or NOT. Since I, too, have a 50% chance of getting confused between my gut instincts and my hopes, I was happy to realize that no matter how much you think you know, there is always more to learn.

Consider below a list of modern day cues, challenged myths and harmless tests in the search for true feelings. They broken down into categories of "LIKES YOU", "NOT" and WOFT (Watch Out For Thorns). Specific exceptions may follow some of these points indicated by "BUT" (couldn't think of any floral references for this word). As you read, you'll get it. I'm sure the A.D.D is kicking in already...

DISCLAIMER: a) This list in non-exclusive. There are several other thoughts, suggestions and tips I didn't include so don't write me telling me "you forgot to say blah blah". I'm not writing a novel here. b) Just because this list clarifies your questions doesn't mean that they aren't subject to change. Love/Like are emotions and emotions are constantly evolving. Only apply these points, to your situation as it stands now, immediate future or in recent past.

1. Meeting the parents. WOFT. First of all if they live at home, then you kindda have to meet their parents anyway so that negates any voluntary intention. Back in the days, meeting parents were the ultimate approval step. Now? I've heard of parents having breakfast with a 1 night stand. Observe to see if they may have one of those "modern" families where they know about everything and everyone because they have an open-minded mentally. If they say, "Hope you stick around long"...then run.
2. Meeting the best friends. WOFT. This means nothing. Their friends may be the sweetest and coolest people but they may just actually be just that...cool. Their interest is their friend's best interest. If their friend's interest is you on a temporary basis, they'll be cool with it. Don't just start exchanging numbers off the bat and trying too hard to make them like you. BUT if all of their friends are coupled up every time you hang out, this may mean something different. Let your gut tell you if they're just using you to not feel left out though.
3. Friend in Need. LIKES YOU. They are and want to be there for you even when you don't ask for help...not in a "I have nothing better to do" or "I need a hobby" way. They just want to contribute to making things within their capacity, easier for you, without anything in return. For example, you've been working long hours and didn't have time to get food earlier (but you can now), but they still make you dinner or get some for you. Another example, you are stuck at an appointment and need to get stamps before the post office closes. Without needing to ask, they volunteer to get you some and drop them off at your place after work. BUT if they ask you to get naked after helping, every time, or now have a list of favors to ask you all of the time...beware.
4. Overly Jealous. NOT. Most people would say that the jealousy is the sign of someone that just can't bare the thought of losing them. This is not true. Overly jealous people are insecure, possessive, control-freaks, and extremely attention hungry. Someone can not care about you at all and still be jealous! That's because they feel you are their bone (canine analogy) until they are done with you...and EVEN THEN can still want claim on you. There are people who date several people at once and still want each persons' undivided loyalty! Remember, this is a character flaw and most likely will never change so you have to figure out if this is something you can handle giving your personality, lifestyle and habits. BUT, if the jealousy is subtle, quiet, passive and infrequent, then this is a good sign. A little rational jealousy is good. Keeps the other person on their toes and can be an indication that they demand a standard of respect in the relationship. This is very healthy so be understanding.
5. Staring. LIKES YOU. You catch them staring at you once in a while with a subtle smile on their face while you are speaking to others. You are being admired. Relish it. This person finds the simple things you do, your sweat after the gym, and messy hair in the morning - refreshing. This is nice. BUT don't confuse the "wow I'm impressed" stare with the dead on "if we were alone, I would put you in pain for days" stare. The latter can be good idea (not to mention needed once in a while), but good doesn't mean sincere feelings. It may just mean the sexual chemistry is explosive and the true feeling is but a lit match.
   
6. You are better than the ex. I say NOT! Someone that keeps comparing you to their ex is someone that has baggage. Yes, they can reference the ex as a base for comparison from a fresh break up, occasionally. But there are the people, that still have ex's pics everywhere (phone, online, home, etc), complains about them, find excuses to talk about them all of the time, and tells you how much better you are........move on. They need a therapist. BUT if his closest friend or parents mention it once, that's a huge plus. You ARE doing something good. Pat yourself on the back and continue the good work.
7. Extended Cuddling and Sniffing. LIKES YOU. After sex and its still relatively early, they want to pull you closer and hold you all night. They hear/feel them smelling your hair and neck. They just want you close because it makes them feel good. They feel comfortable. This may even occur even when sex isn't involved like at the movies, on a walk through the mall, or at a family barbecue. Don't act like a jerk and coy by asking why they are doing that. You know why. Just let them do it subtly.
8. Relatively Expensive, Hard to Get, or highly Creative Gifts. WOFT. If you are getting what you consider very expensive gifts (what most likely you can't get for yourself usually)...this can go either way. Some people learned growing up and/or believe that respect and loyalty are bought. Those people also believe that everyone has a price. The only good news here is you find out what they think yours is (this may boost confidence or hurt a lot). Examples, multi-millionaire buys you a pair of shoes and a few trinkets....you are priced low. Hotel manager buys tickets to the sold out golf tournaments that you've been dying to go to by combing the internet for weeks...you are priced high. Recent college graduate surprises you by buying oils to give you a personal "spa" afternoon and makes their specialty that takes 2 hours to make.......priced very high. Everything is relative. It depends on person, what the gift is and MORE IMPORTANTLY what thought went into the gift, whether $5 at McDonalds because they know you are hungry LOVE the burgers and fries OR a stunning diamond watch just because it would look great on you. Someone that likes you for real wants it to be just perfect. Its your happiness they want, not just an easy way to brownie points or to boost their own egos.
9. Anytime, Anyplace. LIKES YOU. Example, you are at the hottest party of the year, start to feel tired and say let's go, they just say "ok" or finish their drink , start gathering their things, and initiate their goodbyes. They don't say " not yet..I can't leave my friends"; or "I'm going to the bathroom" then disappear to chat and leave you waiting around; or " You are a party pooper"; or "Have one more drink". If they want a little bit more time, they ask nicely for a reasonable extension like 20 minutes. This person enjoys being where ever you are. Its also great if most of the event, the person was next or within visible proximity to you...not because you asked, they have no friends or they think you'll get jealous. They do it because this is where they CHOOSE to be, PREFER to be. Other example, they may love their every Friday night spot, but you suggest movies and a pizza instead? They are down. A better sign is when they don't need to you invite your friends or theirs all of the time. You should be enough sometimes. BUT remember, everyone needs their personal space and time to be with their closest friends without you. Also beware of the person that ALWAYS wants to be alone with you, meet you at your/their place most of the time, or in "off the beaten path" places that aren't their usual spots. They may be trying to keep your "thing" under wraps for some reason...hummm.
10. They told you so. NOT. This has not, is not and never will be an indicator of whether the person really likes you or not. They might be a good player, or bad at breaking heart,s or they really like you. Who knows?! The only way it may means something more is if the statement is unsolicited, the tone, eye contact, the moment and other factors all play well with each other. This one really requires your gut!!! Always remember.......words don't create as strong memories as actual actions do. No matter what the person says, make sure it matches the little and big things they do combined with enough time to allow these actions to repeat themselves. ALL people behave in patterns. Just like players that pretend to be "good", eventually let their true self out ; the person that is truly sincere will show this over and over again - with you, with others. Observe. Words to live by told by my mother: "You can change someones habits but not character". "A person's past and present, gives hints to their future". Don't let wishful thinking or the beautiful sounds of a 3 word phrase, knock out your senses. BUT Closed mouths don't get fed...just ask if you are ready. listen and watch.

:-)

Follow me on Twitter twitter.com/Pauldine

Jack, Jill, and The Hill - Feeling connected (a poem)

Below is a poem that I wrote inspired by an actual story, but I romanticized it a little for some pizazz. This is Valentine's day around the corner giving me the fuzzy feeling. Besides, I felt the story was touching enough to challenge (improve) my writing ability. Note: As we get older, its A LOT harder to find words that rhyme.....
Inspired by "U".... ENJOY!

Jack and Jill

Like dots in the sky; two collide
A universe made suddenly so small
Jack and Jill accept to enter this ride
Acquaintances but the others eye brought thrall

Having what most others around lacked,
mystery stranger with magnetic smile
how life's luck, Jill met Jack
a sense of closeness, had not been felt in a while

Busy all day but still they made time
for this perfect stranger attraction
Hours spent, moments talking sublime.
On each other, focused, without any distraction

Jack and Jill had formulated a bond
something most have never felt.
A connection, a "click", a correspond,
anticipated daily, most of theirs needs mutually met

No matter in happiness or in sorrow,
priority, face time was key.
Knowing about yesterday, today, tomorrow,
They were each others true loyal devotee.

Jack saw needs more than this, done
desiring the next step for them.
A closer physical link to be one
or else locked in a box, fate would condemn

He picked up the phone, Jill would answer
"My sweetie's voice, he thought.
His news should enchant grace like a dancer
but this announcement only brought distraught

"I've dreamed of this day", Jill would tell
between us, a picture perfect love
But reality has had me dispel
your words delayed, a solution found thereof

Jill had grown up, mind aged from chatting
never uttered those words to Jack.
A hill, Seeing no change; not worth combating
Jill desiring a climb, Jack aware but ignored a lack

Issue is, Jack and Jill never in presense met,
pictorial perspectives; writing brought unity
Screen love like none real yet
comments and messages were months; hinted eternity

Maybe one day, miles will be a step
Jack and Jill to progress yet will remember
A journey they will have kept
password protected, fire not, but yet, still ember.

:-)

Brain Fart

After last night's last minute crunch on a rather long blog, my brain needs a break. I was also not really feeling inspired by any of the topics I was suggested. Maybe I'll have better luck tomorrow....Good night!