Guys, its your turn again this evening for some more do's and don'ts for reflecting a classy image without sacrificing sex appeal or comfort when on the dating/socializing scene.
NOTE:How the blog is broken up: an individual's appeal starts with first impression then moves to personality/body language.
DISCLAIMER (reminder): Because there were SO many different things to write about on this subject, I decided to stick to 1 main issue each night of the Valentine's Day week 2011, one for the ladies and 1 for the gents, alternating. Here you go boys....
Wednesday, February 16
GENTS
First Impression
- Choppers. So that attractive fellow walks into the room. His clothes fit right. He's got that thing that we refer to as swag today. Everything looks in place and he's approaching then he gives you a beaming smile. Oh no! His teeth! They are yellowed, stained, crooked and tartar filled. Yes this applies to women as well but I must say, I've heard more complaints about this from women then the other way around. I pondered why and realized it may be about habits. Men tend to drink more work related coffee, several smoke cigars, drink whiskey, soft drinks and men in general pay less attention to the "details" then women do. There are many exceptions to this but the exceptions are not the problem. The problem is that attention to dental hygiene and general mouth appeal is not a standard. Examples of exceptions are the guys that are secure in their manhood enough to wear a pink shirt. Other exceptions are guys that like romantic comedies, start the toothpaste tube at the end or put the toilet seat down. A man's nice smile should be a basic requirement. English novelist, Charles Reade, once said "Beauty is power; a smile is its sword". Even Mother Theresa gave this little gesture a very importance place in civility when she said "Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing". I've personally seen how these "beautiful" things have sliced my hopes like a sword to a balloon. Now let me be clear, we ladies don't want to see a mouth full of Chicklets. That look only looks nice on horses and Jim Carey. What looks nice is straight, off white (hence why they refer to nice teeth as pearly whites), with fresh breath to boot. A horrible smile and white coated tongue can destroy everything, from conversation to the expectation of a good night kiss. It makes you look dirty and gives the impression of bad hygiene. Another thing I've noticed are guys that speak with a mouth full of excess saliva or crusty white stuff at the corner of their mouth. EWWWW! I can't focus on a word you say with those kind of distractions. Yes, there are ladies that don't care or notice BUT, seriously, do you even WANT a chick that would accept or ignore what YOU WOULDN"T...what YOU COULDN'T ignore if it was the other way around??? A gorgeous smile would not only melt hearts but also set a standard in the women you speak to. Get that issue, which I refer to as Dentition Degradation, fixed.
- Breath. Bad breath can come from not brushing your tongue well, drinking things that are too hot, not drinking enough water, not speaking often enough (speaking oxygenates your mouth which can reduce the "toxicity"), ulcers or other digestive issues (which maybe work stress related), smoking, drinking beer (I hate beer smell) and eating strong smelling food (try brushing out curry or garlic). I'm not going to suggest that you carry your dental kit every where you go. Its not practical and requires too much effort for most guys. I have a ground breaking tip..................................wait for it....................................................ah oh it's coming.......................................................minty gum or mints. I know I know. I just blew your socks off. I'm a genius....
- Color. Not sure if your grill falls into the stained and yellowing category? Although I can't understand how someone can't tell, I entertain your blindness and give you the following tip. Go to the supermarket and buy a white onion..no..don't eat it! duh! Remove the first layer and hold it against your teeth. How many shades off are your teeth? If your teeth are clearly darker than that onion, you may need to visit a dental hygienist for a cleaning and bleach. It only takes a little over an hour in an office or you can request to take trays home for less money. You can even go to a drugstore and buy an at home kit. BUT if your teeth against that white onion looks like it belongs in another color category like the yellows, browns or greys, then you need professional help and perhaps a new set of teeth all together....
- Connection. A little dimension in the teeth in terms of length, width, doesn't have to be a bad things. I've seen adorable gaps and cute overbites. Problems arise when gaps exist with more than 1 or 2 teeth. Its like each tooth got into a fight with each other decided they wanted to live in single homes versus adjoined townhouses. Chipped, or razor blade sharp, fang looking incisors, or teeth that can figure out whether they want to stand in front so they zip zag, alternating heights like the NYC skyline.....not cute. This requires a financial commitment, a sacrifice of a few days of eating hard food and a swollen face. If you think the latter sentence is enough for you not to go to a dentist then you obviously have an issue with setting priorities. Side note: Have you ever noticed that its some of the people with the most messed up teeth that seem to want to smile the most? no..hum...maybe it's just my observation but then again I'm a girl that notices the details.
Personality and Body Language
- Hot Mess. Ever notice some guys that can't stop from cracking jokes even when someone's family member dies? Or those guys that you can be having a serious discussion and they can't focus instead they make a dumb comment that makes the table go silent? Better yet, how about that guy that bounces up and down the sofa, unbuttons his shirt at the club, intentionally drinks to much to "loosen up", and/or suddenly thinks he can break dance because he has an audience. Yep...I call that.. a Dumb Ass. Immature men and men with so sense of composure, is a huge turn off for us ladies. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with partying and hanging out, throw a few jokes around and a fun time getting loose. There are limits and a time/place for everything!!! Start learning to tell if people are laughing at you or with you. How can you tell? If everyone is doing what you are doing, acting how you are acting, then they are laughing with you (or you also have Dumb Ass friends which means you have to widen your scope by looking at the rest of the room). If everyone is acting more laid back and you are the center of attention, then most likely they are laughing AT YOU. You think women want to hear about the time you caught your parents doing the nasty or the new hot video game or how your parents are soooo unfair for treating you like a kid? NO we don't. Clean up and control yourself boy. Not every situation or every event is World Cup or the Super Bowl so grow up and know that there is a way to act and alcohol as an excuse doesn't cut it in the long run. This same rule applies to guys that spend the entire night trying to speak to various woman and/or taking pictures as close as they can to boobs while holding what ever bottle they chipped in on.......These guys are another level from the Dumb Ass. He's just a Tacky Prick, what my good friend and I call................AMATEURS. Don't be that guy....
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