Earthlings Movie - Warning! THIS IS SHOCKING

Make the Connection. EARTHLINGS.com

I wish I was strong enough to finish watching this movie but I'm not. I only last 23 minutes. I'm still tearing as I type this and can't seem to manage how this affects my future decision making. i thought I could handle almost anything but this is just too much....

WARNING - If you don't have a strong stomach, you love animals, and don't know where your food comes from.............DON'T WATCH THIS MOVIE....

If you want a dose of reality..............do you best to focus...

Who says America is wasteful?

I order 3 tiny light bulbs for a chandelier and it came in a box that could fit 100...shouldn't companies be levied extra taxes for things like this? Some airlines charge an environmental fee so why shouldn't other industries? Things that make you say...duh!
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A Break this Weekend - Reflection

I'm going to be out of commission this weekend. My brain needs a break. Sometimes we need to realize that we've taken on too much and step back. This the only way to truly be able to move forward and accomplish our tasks successfully.

Biggie Smalls - What's Beef

"Things could be worst moment" of the day: You think you are angry? Having a bad day? Listen to the lyrics of this song. You know how angry someone has to be to write a song like this????? Just be happy you aren't as angry as this OR YOU DON"T HAVE SOMEONE THIS ANGRY AT YOU!!!! Positive thinking....

Ciara Feat. Ludacris - Ride it (Official Music Video)

The workout inspiration of the week! Cardio cardio and squats! No excuses...Getting a body like this takes alot of dedication and no carbs!! Do it

Today's Throwback! Set Adrift On Memory Bliss - PM Dawn (HQ Audio)

This song was part of the inspiration of my last post, Positive Poisoning. Download this to your IPOD. It's a great song. Can you believe this song was released in 1991??

Positive Poisoning - The Closure though Troubled Times

When people's relationships break off whether its in business, a fling, committed relationship or simply a friendship, the sentence I hear the most is "I need closure". I've had 2 different people from opposite sides of the world tell me about this burning desire this week...........closure. I had to really think about what this word is supposed to really mean...how this word is supposed to manifest.

In order to tackle the abstraction of this word, I first had to analyze my own past experiences. My recent relationship's breakup, as people have told me, should have taken at least a year to get over. Three years, I "gave" myself to someone whom I ended up nursing until I ran dry. I didn't want to fail so I kept on but in the end the person I thought I loved was no longer. SPLIT! Right before the holidays in 2010. As anyone would be in a major life adjustment, I was destroyed...couldn't sleep, cried for a week, started smoking again, and had enough anger in me to set everything around me on fire just by looking at it. It took me a month and a half to get over it. Why was it so fast? I'm assuming because :A) this wasn't my heart's first disappointment. As I'm no "spring chicken", these things get easier (or at least they should) . B) My ex made it easy. How so? I'll give an analogy just so I don't completely expose the exact issues. Imagine trying out a new seafood restaurant and getting food poisoning the next day. Fever, hot flashes, and nausea lead you to see a doctor. Imagine the doctor telling you that everyone that has been to that restaurant has gotten the same illness. So? Do you miss the meal you had? Or accept that the consequences suck, and get better. THAT was my closure - I got sick and didn't want to go back to expose myself to that again. PERIOD. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the meal and had high hopes of making that MY seafood joint but it didn't work out as planned. That type of rationalization is something that comes with time and experience. I'm not that old, or wise, but the ex before the last probably help take the edge off of any other future break ups whether in love or friendship. I was younger, a hopeless romantic, and un-jaded. I learned...the hard way. Most importantly, I learned to love myself over anything else. Sure, I miss the "innocence" of my idealistic desires but I learned jumping into relationships both feet forward and blind may lead to injury so I keep an open eye and deep down I meditate. Ommmmm. Repeat. "I got over the last one and always did better...I WILL do it again". Ommmmm. "Why be miserable when someone else sleeps peacefully in their ignorant bliss?". Ommmmm. "I love myself, what I stand for, and the intrinsic value I offer to another enough to give someone else the time and opportunity to discover it". English Writer, John Heyward said "If you will call your troubles experiences, and remember that every experience develops some latent force within you, you will grow vigorous and happy however adverse your circumstances seem to be". Summary? Your strength and inner power gets stronger as time passes and you go through life's crappy moments... BECAUSE YOUR ABILITY TO RECOVER BETTER IS DUE TO AN ACCUMULATION OF WHAT IS LEARNED IN RETROSPECT FROM THE CRAP.

Let's test this out. Clear your mind. Think of the last time, someone you trusted disappointed you. It can be a best friend, a family member, a lover, a spouse, a pet, a emploer...whatever. This about how low that person made you feel. Think about the anger, rage, need for revenge, need to discuss, the tears, the bad words exchanged...whatever you were feeling at the time. Thinking about it?

What was your "closure" ? What helped you feel better? What helped you accept and move on with your life? No matter what your answer was from keying their car, blocking them on Facebook, ripping pictures, trying to be friends, bad mouthing the person everywhere, basking in their failures, to talking things through....because you DID something about it, right? Nope. What you did was self satisfy a desire for acknowledgment and recognition whether positive or negative. What helped the agitation pass is ...........................yes, time...........but also, we WANT to live TO SEE time pass. Those that don't are hospitalized in a rehab centers, fighting addictions, and pondering selfish suicidal thoughts. It is the fact that you are now living in the future tense of these situations and are looking at it in retrospect, in hind sight. You thought I was going to say that time heals all wounds, right? Wrong! We begin to HEAL the moment we CHOOSE to. Its a re-prioritization in focus. Its a TEST to our ability to SURVIVE. Its the CHARACTER that your reflection in the mirror SHOULD reflect. Do you see it? Will you see it? DO YOU WANT TO SEE IT?

Martha Washington, 1st US president George Washington's wife: "I have learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness OR misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances".

Going back to the seafood analogy. If you were in my situation, would you never eat seafood anywhere again? Of course not, especially if you love seafood as much as I do. You can't avoid something you like, something you desire, something that may be accessible to you just because you are afraid that you'll get sick again. Not every seafood restaurant wants to disappoint its clients or has negligent standards of quality. The difference is the next time, if something smells or looks off, you'll be more careful. If people you trust tell you to avoid the place, you have a CHOICE to do so. This is called taking a calculated risk still bearing in mind that we may still be disappointed in one way or another. "A man's errors are his portals of discovery", the great James Joyce noted. This works both ways - the hurt and the hurtor - so everyone eventually gets it but you need to focus on when you do. "Discovery" happens at various paces and, I believe, it depends on how ready we are to ACCEPT THAT WE DESERVE TO BE HAPPY; TO LIVE!!! Another lover, a new friend, shopping, gossiping, work, alcohol, cigarettes, psychiatrist, drugs.....nothing......can do this for us BUT US. All the aforementioned are, are temporary/immediate solutions to preoccupy our attention while we avoid reality. You, Us, We, I, He, She, They......however you reference the "hurt".....is sub-consciously postponing the "discovery", the "experience", the wisdom for a more empowered continuance of our life.

Final words....I will let Norman Vincent Peale, author of The Power of Positive Thinking, tell you : "One of the greatest moments in anybody's developing experiences is when he no longer tries to hide from himself but determines to get acquainted with himself as he really is".

PS...Today is officially 1 week without a cigarette. I CHOSE not to poison my lungs and shorten my life while another could breathe freely. Every puff was a reminder of how damaged I had allowed myself to be; how "affected" I was. I am no longer...case closed...next.

:-)

Its Friday

Not going to post today.....heading out!!!!! Kisses!!!

Ladies Thursday Vodka Cranberry - The Coop

Today, I'm once again going to address the ladies about my do's and don'ts for reflecting a classy image without sacrificing sex appeal or comfort when on the dating/socializing scene.

NOTE:These series of posts have been broken up in 2 steps in the past few days. Since an individual's appeal starts with first impression then moves to personality/body language, the posts were subdivided accordingly. This time I'm going to lump the first impression and personality/behavior together as today's topic was hard to "separate" (after you read, you'll see why this is a pun that needs to be pardoned).

DISCLAIMER (reminder): Because there were SO many different things to write about on this subject, I decided to stick to 1 main issue each night of the Valentine's Day week 2011, one for the ladies and 1 for the gents, alternating. Just for the girls....

Thursday, February 17

Ladies

First Impression

• League of One. "Tell me the company the keep and I'll tell you who you are". This was said by Miguel de Cervantes, a Spanish author and poet in the 16th century! Many have stated similar before him and after him. We want to believe that most don't "judge a book by its cover" but it just isn't true when it comes to first impressions. We observe life in about 200 degrees with 20/20 and good peripheral vision but the world looks at us in 360 degrees..worst yet..in a sphere with various angles (SAT word of the day - parallax - look it up). Do you think you are ready to step on stage? For the ladies that can't understand why only dirty old men are approaching them...maybe its because you walked in with a small posse of girls that all look/dress similar in short little lycra dresses. That's an IDEAL situation for the guy that wants to throw a net and catch a big load for the evening. Most likely at his age, he wants to maximize his efforts and time so how perfect to speak few words to a larger audience instead of going one by one! Maybe you don't understand why a guy group's tool is sent to offer you guys to come to their table or join them for drinks. Again it's the same thought process. "One or all of them has got to bite" they think. You want to know why as an individual, you can't capture attention separate from the group, because you guys seem so stuck to each other that a guy feels obligated to lump you all into the same category - chicks. Unless you are rolling with a pack of Ugly Bettys (some do this on purpose), most likely you aren't going to stand out as an individual unless you STAND AS AN INDIVIDUAL. This doesn't mean you want to be THAT girl sitting all by herself or walking into places alone. I know company can help us women feel a little more secure especially when we think we may potentially have to deal with a pack of wolves. I'm with you. Where you lose me is: going to the bathroom together, walking to every point of the room as a huddle, dancing as a clan, all staring at the same guy, and sometimes all ordering the same drink! Remember, even if you DO stand out for whatever reason, a man that is considering an approach has to calculate whether he is ready to commit to your entire assemblage. First there is the cost to his pocket AND there is his attention. Even with committed and loyal wing man, he has to think and re-think the worth and potential outcome(s) of him entering your clique. This is why you'll see a group of girls jamming to their song and not one guy around them (or only with the chump selected to cover the expenses of that faction for the outing - or he's gay). Another point is WHO is part of your consort? You can be the nice, funny, smart, good, classy type , but if the rest of your girl band is on their 10th Tequila shots, flashing panties (intentialy or accidentally), leaning over wasted, dancing ridiculously to over-played songs (ever heard the shreaking sound of "that's my sooonnnnggg"), talking to anyone/everyone (overly accessible), crashing people's tables for free drinks, or their intelligence limits them to believing gossip mags are real news...then you are screwed. The first thing to do is step outside of yourself and observe you and your company as an entity OBJECTIVELY (like a stranger would - subjectively). Don't you wonder WHAT IS THE COMMON DENOMINATOR that links you all together? Have you heard if you walk like a duck, quack like a duck, you must be a duck? Or birds of a feather flock together? (Just realized the bird trend here - the "chicken head" label must be related to this). This is because someone's "feathers" say a lot. Black, Brown, Grey, and White pigeons all fly together. They may each be different but similar looks, behaviors and habits lead us to believe they are all the same even it there is a dove sitting among them. Would YOU sit and look at each bird or would you just throw some bread all around and hope they nibble?? How do you recover from Barricaded Uniform Clustering (BUC - don't you love my coined medical terms..lol)? Here are a few thoughts:

1. Break from the pack and walk around alone or as a pair once in a while.
2. Don't just speak to your group. Give them your back once in awhile and give eye contact to several points in the room. Seem interested in things outside of your group.
3. If you see someone you want to talk to that is looking at you, don't turn around and tell your girlfriends which will inevitably all turn and stare at hi,. Give him coy eye contact which means you are open to chat. Take a few steps to the side so he know you are ABLE to "break the chain".
4. This is the mean advice: if your friends are really acting out of your confort zone and you are feeling its a bad look for you THEN DO EXAXTLY THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT THEY ARE DOING. They are jumping around? Stand still and crack jokes with someone. They are downing shots? Have a glass of long drink like a sex-on-the-beach so you are sipping.
5. Find out what everyone is wearing in advance. Nothing new there right? We have all done it! But here's the kicker...make an effort to look different. This doesn't mean trying to out-glam your friends. I'm just saying to reflect a personal touch in your flair whether its in the accessories, hairstyle, color choices...whatever shows some individuality. Take a hint from Sex in the City on how to look PART of the group but still with a look that is YOUR OWN.
6. Don't go to the bathroom ALL TOGETHER. I don't get this at all. Really? Why? What can you possibly have to say between clearing your bladder, flushing and checking your makeup that you HAD to have a board meeting in a place where people get rid of their bodily WASTE (or feed their drug habits - all depends where you are)?

Personality and Body Language

• The Pack. Same as above.

:-)

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Gents Wednesday Gin and Tonic - Choppers and Chumping

Guys, its your turn again this evening for some more do's and don'ts for reflecting a classy image without sacrificing sex appeal or comfort when on the dating/socializing scene.

NOTE:How the blog is broken up: an individual's appeal starts with first impression then moves to personality/body language.

DISCLAIMER (reminder): Because there were SO many different things to write about on this subject, I decided to stick to 1 main issue each night of the Valentine's Day week 2011, one for the ladies and 1 for the gents, alternating. Here you go boys....

Wednesday, February 16

GENTS

First Impression

• Choppers. So that attractive fellow walks into the room. His clothes fit right. He's got that thing that we refer to as swag today. Everything looks in place and he's approaching then he gives you a beaming smile. Oh no! His teeth! They are yellowed, stained, crooked and tartar filled. Yes this applies to women as well but I must say, I've heard more complaints about this from women then the other way around. I pondered why and realized it may be about habits. Men tend to drink more work related coffee, several smoke cigars, drink whiskey, soft drinks and men in general pay less attention to the "details" then women do. There are many exceptions to this but the exceptions are not the problem. The problem is that attention to dental hygiene and general mouth appeal is not a standard. Examples of exceptions are the guys that are secure in their manhood enough to wear a pink shirt. Other exceptions are guys that like romantic comedies, start the toothpaste tube at the end or put the toilet seat down. A man's nice smile should be a basic requirement. English novelist, Charles Reade, once said "Beauty is power; a smile is its sword". Even Mother Theresa gave this little gesture a very importance place in civility when she said "Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing". I've personally seen how these "beautiful" things have sliced my hopes like a sword to a balloon. Now let me be clear, we ladies don't want to see a mouth full of Chicklets. That look only looks nice on horses and Jim Carey. What looks nice is straight, off white (hence why they refer to nice teeth as pearly whites), with fresh breath to boot. A horrible smile and white coated tongue can destroy everything, from conversation to the expectation of a good night kiss. It makes you look dirty and gives the impression of bad hygiene. Another thing I've noticed are guys that speak with a mouth full of excess saliva or crusty white stuff at the corner of their mouth. EWWWW! I can't focus on a word you say with those kind of distractions. Yes, there are ladies that don't care or notice BUT, seriously, do you even WANT a chick that would accept or ignore what YOU WOULDN"T...what YOU COULDN'T ignore if it was the other way around??? A gorgeous smile would not only melt hearts but also set a standard in the women you speak to. Get that issue, which I refer to as Dentition Degradation, fixed.
  

1. Breath. Bad breath can come from not brushing your tongue well, drinking things that are too hot, not drinking enough water, not speaking often enough (speaking oxygenates your mouth which can reduce the "toxicity"), ulcers or other digestive issues (which maybe work stress related), smoking, drinking beer (I hate beer smell) and eating strong smelling food (try brushing out curry or garlic). I'm not going to suggest that you carry your dental kit every where you go. Its not practical and requires too much effort for most guys. I have a ground breaking tip..................................wait for it....................................................ah oh it's coming.......................................................minty gum or mints. I know I know. I just blew your socks off. I'm a genius....
   
2. Color. Not sure if your grill falls into the stained and yellowing category? Although I can't understand how someone can't tell, I entertain your blindness and give you the following tip. Go to the supermarket and buy a white onion..no..don't eat it! duh! Remove the first layer and hold it against your teeth. How many shades off are your teeth? If your teeth are clearly darker than that onion, you may need to visit a dental hygienist for a cleaning and bleach. It only takes a little over an hour in an office or you can request to take trays home for less money. You can even go to a drugstore and buy an at home kit. BUT if your teeth against that white onion looks like it belongs in another color category like the yellows, browns or greys, then you need professional help and perhaps a new set of teeth all together....
   
3. Connection. A little dimension in the teeth in terms of length, width, doesn't have to be a bad things. I've seen adorable gaps and cute overbites. Problems arise when gaps exist with more than 1 or 2 teeth. Its like each tooth got into a fight with each other decided they wanted to live in single homes versus adjoined townhouses. Chipped, or razor blade sharp, fang looking incisors, or teeth that can figure out whether they want to stand in front so they zip zag, alternating heights like the NYC skyline.....not cute. This requires a financial commitment, a sacrifice of a few days of eating hard food and a swollen face. If you think the latter sentence is enough for you not to go to a dentist then you obviously have an issue with setting priorities. Side note: Have you ever noticed that its some of the people with the most messed up teeth that seem to want to smile the most? no..hum...maybe it's just my observation but then again I'm a girl that notices the details.
   

Personality and Body Language

• Hot Mess. Ever notice some guys that can't stop from cracking jokes even when someone's family member dies? Or those guys that you can be having a serious discussion and they can't focus instead they make a dumb comment that makes the table go silent? Better yet, how about that guy that bounces up and down the sofa, unbuttons his shirt at the club, intentionally drinks to much to "loosen up", and/or suddenly thinks he can break dance because he has an audience. Yep...I call that.. a Dumb Ass. Immature men and men with so sense of composure, is a huge turn off for us ladies. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with partying and hanging out, throw a few jokes around and a fun time getting loose. There are limits and a time/place for everything!!! Start learning to tell if people are laughing at you or with you. How can you tell? If everyone is doing what you are doing, acting how you are acting, then they are laughing with you (or you also have Dumb Ass friends which means you have to widen your scope by looking at the rest of the room). If everyone is acting more laid back and you are the center of attention, then most likely they are laughing AT YOU. You think women want to hear about the time you caught your parents doing the nasty or the new hot video game or how your parents are soooo unfair for treating you like a kid? NO we don't. Clean up and control yourself boy. Not every situation or every event is World Cup or the Super Bowl so grow up and know that there is a way to act and alcohol as an excuse doesn't cut it in the long run. This same rule applies to guys that spend the entire night trying to speak to various woman and/or taking pictures as close as they can to boobs while holding what ever bottle they chipped in on.......These guys are another level from the Dumb Ass. He's just a Tacky Prick, what my good friend and I call................AMATEURS. Don't be that guy....
  

:-)

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A-ha - Take On Me (Official Music video)

You know you are stuck in the 80's when you have A Ha "Take on me" in your Ipod AND STILL want to dance around with an imaginary microphone....Its still one of the best videos ever...

Ladiess Tuesday Cosmopolitan - Cakes and Strut

This is day 3 of the do's and don'ts of reflecting a classy image without sacrificing sex appeal or comfort when on the dating/socializing scene. These series of posts are not to be offensive but instead the light at the end of the taste tunnel.

Sorry this post is coming so late but after Valentine's Day yesterday, I was a little out of it today.

How the blog is broken up: an individual's appeal starts with first impression then moves to personality/body language.

DISCLAIMER (reminder): Because there were SO many different things to write about on this subject, I decided to stick to 1 main issue each night of the Valentine's Day week 2011, one for the ladies and 1 for the gents, alternating. Ladies again....

Tuesday, February 15

LADIES

First Impression

• Caked up. I see them all of the time. I know some of them personally. The ladies that take 2 hours to pile on 3 layers of cosmetics in order to improve their beauty. This habit dates back to the time of Cleopatra around 30BC, way before cosmetic surgery and skin care became a billion dollar business. So why with all of the innovations for skin protection and skin improvement, that ladies still feel the need to cover every inch of their face, whether day or night, with enough coloring to paint a mid-sized car? As a woman, I ,too, have a collection of Nars, MAC, Bobbi Brown, L'Oreal, among others. I don't even use of all the things I buy. I just like to feel I have everything I need, and like in my toddler years, I love seeing all of the colors in my box (boxes, actually). I think many women can relate to this. Makeup is a necessary part of our regimen. It is our womanly right to cover up and enhance whatever in order to beguile men and our female peers into believing we are as perfect as the woman next door or the one on the cover. I get it. Age doesn't do a woman's body any good. Between dark eye circles, enlarged pores, sun spots, blotchy skin - list goes on of possibilities - we have to work to keep things together. But this isn't for the average woman. This is for THAT woman. My issue is with the women that thins out their eyebrows just to paint them back in with a pencil. My concern is with the women that coordinates their makeup to reflect the colors in their outfits. My thoughts pertain to the women whose face has so much primer, concealer, foundation and powder that their faces become as hard to stay as it is to cut a piece of lasagna while keeping the layers in tack. It is to those women that keep leaving stains on my face and shirt when giving me welcoming hugs and kisses. Some people out there owe a lot of dry cleaning money.....As always, I have my little list of cues and suggestions for improving this horrible state which I call, Unrestrained Facial Morphia (UFM)
  

1. Eyebrows. FYI:..the more you wax and pluck, the less they grow so keep that in mind when you are having someone rip out half of your eyebrows. Get a clue: Pencils NEVER replicate the look of an actual brow!!!! Especially the black ones! I just don't get it. Ever seen a clown at the circus? Ever take a good look at Minnie Mouse? You think that's hot? If you don't think your brows are full enough, there is a right way for filling them up. A) You can have your brows tinted at the salon to a shade 1-2 shades darker than your hair. B) Buy an angled tip eyeshadow brow and use eyeshadow using sweeping motions that would replicate the direction your brows grow C) Too used to the pencil? Buy a pencil made for brows in the color of your brows, not your hair or hair color you wished you were. Finish off with clear mascara to create a finished clean look that won't budge. Look in the mirror right now. Are you surprised as the simplicity of the tips? Or you just just look surprised because you crayoned your brow too high?
   
2. Eye lids. I am a big advocate for going out and putting the make up artistry skills to the test. I've blended up to 3 colors to create the perfect hue to make my eyes pop but I know my limits. I know I can't do all of the tricks I see in the magazines, and as a black woman, I prefer not to attempt the trendy citrus bright yellow hitting the runways. Know when to stop! Your eye lids don't have to match your purple, green and red polka dot dress (God forbid you would even want to wear a dress like that - your issue would really be color blindness)! Colors change by season so go accordingly but keeping in mind that your skin tone should determine which colors to wear, not your outfit. TIP. Metallics and Glitter during the day is off putting. Would you wear a silver sequined top to work? If your answer is yes, then once again, your problem is way deeper than this post can address. TIP: If going to play up the eyes, go subtle on the lips. POW on the eyes and BAM on the lips is an epileptic's nightmare. TOO MUCH TOO LOOK AT. Pick one, preferably, your preferred feature and keep yourself from looking like a Vegas showgirl.
   
3. Blushing. Ok...Do you know what blush is supposed to do? The purpose originally was to give pale women the look of being sun kissed and child like by giving the appearance of full cheeks. That intent has not changed. So why do so many ladies look like they stepped out of their place after a domestic dispute??? I can't tell if its too much blush or if I should call the police and report a woman beater! The best way to avoid this is to apply blush last. Also make sure you keep you brush clean or avoid over depositing. Tap your brush with the blush before apply to remove excess. Choose colors that look like what would rosy cheeks would look like after a little sun. If you are trying to make your face look thinner, use bronzer or a foundation 1-2 shades darker for a more natural effect. Please help stop all of the 911 abuse false alarms.
4. Your Base. There are 3 steps here: Concealer, Foundation and Powder. My tip is only do these 3 if you are going out at night to somewhere where you might sweat or is dark, going to photo shoot or are over 45. Concealer is to..you guessed it..conceal! If you apply it all over your face, you might as well wear a paper bag over your head or should consult a cosmetic dermatologist/surgeon. Apply lightly under the eyes or on any spots. That's all you need. Your foundation should be a light one for the day and a heavier if needed for more engaging events. Powder should be dusted lightly with a brush and not with those bacteria filled pads., It serves to set the entire look. Use a translucent one for day. These are commonly known tips so I'll go the issue that bothers me the most -- WHEN THE COLORS DON'T MATCH YOUR SKIN!!! Everyone can tell that sharp line between the jaw and the neck. Black girls like ashy while their neck is chocolate. White girls look orange or bright pink while their neck looks ivory. Since you can't apply makeup ALL OVER your body (unless you are a supermodel or Kim Kardashian), people can tell that the color difference comes from makeup. Remember, makeup is supposed to enhance what you already have, not morph you into another face. Besides, you know how disappointing it is when a significant other's pillow is damaged or sees the real you in the morning. Men think its beer goggles but its actually it's the make up mask lifted. Don't be THAT girl.

Personality and Body Language

• Off Stride. There is nothing more unattractive that a woman that can't walk in heels and walks like she had an 800lbs gorilla on her shoulders. Stand up straight! If Haitian women can walk up hills and mountain sides with buckets of water balanced on cloth and still stand up straight -- SO CAN YOU! When a woman walks into a space, aside form the way she looks, there is an energy that she gives off with her eye contact, stance, and stride. A woman in control of her body movement is a woman that can exude power, class, respect and charm - all at once. Do you know why so many of us are in awe at models on the runway? Because there is something is the long line from toe to head coming as you with hips swaying. Whether you are 4ft or 6ft, standing tall, walking comfortably straight, eyes up and glancing around, and a good posture, says don't ____ with me. I've seen so many women degrade amazing shoes by walking like a duck with toes pointed out, wobbly or stomping like they are rain dancing. Life is a runway honey...work it! As far as we know, your life show only has 1 premiere so take advantage and make everywhere you walk into your stage to exude confidence (even if you aren't so confident). This can get you jobs AND dates. If you think you can't walk in heels, then start low or buy a bigger size! TIP: If you know there is a possibility that you will be spending over 2 hours standing up or walking around, don't wear the shoes YOU KNOW are going to kill your feet after 20 minutes for the sake of looking cute. Why? Because when you have to sit down for an hour while everyone else is still up or have that I-can't-feel-my-toes face, everyone can see it. You stop the flow of things around you because of your shoes. (TIP TO THE GUYS: A woman has needs a 1 hour up and 20 minute down, stand to sit ratio. This is as much as we can give you without wearing sneakers or grand ma shoes. Plan accordingly. Don't park too far. Find a stool at the bar for her. Do the right thing and it will play in your favor)

:-)

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